Tag Archives: lyrics

Poetry.com is back!

I got an email telling me that Poetry.com is back, up and running again and this is so exciting for me!

I used to post on there daily and sometimes several times a day and I was getting a good reputation on there until it closed down.

I may now post my poetry only on there, but I am unsure. I did originally want this blog to be more focused on my redefining myself, finding myself, my path to a better me and my creative career. I also wanted this blog to concentrate on snippets, advice and short stories. Poetry was not really meant to be a part of this blog.

I don’t know, perhaps I will still post here but also Poetry.com?

I know that Poetry.com also likes songs and lyrics etc, so I will be more inclined to write those again, which is great!

My username at Poetry.com is TardyCreative, so see you there!

I am not giving this blog up, don’t worry, I plan to become active on here for a very long time!

Happy Reading!

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Reflections of consequence

Upon reflecting at my notes for new stories, I realise that around a third of everything I plan to write is vampire based.  So this is a revelation because I thought I wrote vampires more than any other subject, but no, it is second to fantasy.  Horror is actually not within the top three subjects I write about but is actually fourth, behind dystopia. 

The poetry I write is really just a means to fulfil the frustrated composer and song writer in me.  Poetry is a way in keeping me sane from the loss of composing music via Cubase, I no longer have Cubase and there is a void in my heart because of it.  I can’t read and write music properly but I have been trying to learn recently, so I can try and learn to cope without Cubase, as I miss it a lot.  I have no desire whatsoever to be a singer though; I just love making music and writing lyrics.

I think about music as much as I think about my stories, but I have learned to give up music for various reasons.  Occasionally ignoring it can make me go literally insane enough that I have to blurt out poetry just to shut the thoughts up in my mind, but it is starting to get quite loud in my mind lately.  Not sure how long I have before I will give in and sell stuff just to get another type of music software to help me.  I bought a glockenspiel last year hoping to sate my need for music and around once every eighteen months I notice I buy a new instrument just to try and sate the musician in me, but I think my brain is getting wise to these distractions.

I do believe that if you are creative and you have many outlets, to ignore any one of those outlets for too long can both make you go nuts, but also seep into your other creative works and make you resent the attention you give them, because you are ignoring the other.  All creative outlets are both food and poison for the other ones, depends on whether or not they feel neglected or not, a bit like a polygamous lover, you know?

I am an Artist, Gardener, Musician, Writer; I do sing and I used to like acting in drama classes at college, I do voices too.  It is strange that since I totally gave up practising my voices, that I have been getting a lot of illnesses that affect the throat, some spiritual healers tell me they are not surprised, because it is the throat chakras way in responding to this creative neglect.  I suppose too then, that when I don’t write for a while, the migraines I get in my head are to do with the stories having a civil war in my mind too?

I’m very spiritual, so to me, everything happens for a reason and I believe that sickness can be caused because you are neglecting a spiritual or creative part of you.  I think love and freedom has a lot to do with a person’s overall health and I suppose that it is this reason that I am ill.  I don’t have much love and I never had much freedom, I don’t mean to sound whiny but it is true and therefore, it is unsurprising that I have autoimmunity issues.

I am very unsurprised that a vast majority of my illnesses are ear, throat and stomach related.  Because throughout my life I have heard things I do not like to hear, I have never spoken about what has happened to me and I hold back when trying to stand up for myself verbally, I also ate things I never wanted to.  So when you reflect on things like this, you can plainly see how it can all make you ill in those parts of you.

I find myself a lot, saying to people I don’t want to hear this, it is not kind, I don’t want to hear this, it is too negative.  I am such a sensitive person, I don’t like hearing negative things spoken all the time, I don’t like hearing another person’s distress.  I lost my hearing when I was a teenager in my right ear, because I kept hearing things I didn’t like, now I still hear things I don’t like and gradually I am losing hearing in the left ear too.

I either have to become harder and more tolerant to what I hear, or completely isolate myself from society altogether, lol.  If I chose the latter, it will surely affect the health of my heart due to a lack of connection and love?  So I will have to learn to harden up and become tolerant to the negativity around me, I don’t know how I will do that, but it needs to start happening soon, or I won’t be able to hear music anymore, let alone play it.

Anyway, happy reading and I will post again tomorrow, thank you for being here!

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Unicorns Lullaby

Walking through the woods on a cool summers day

Taking in the scents and watching fairies at play

I wandered through the shade of the trees

Touching each blossom as I pass with ease

I walked through some bluebells in a clearing

When something of interest caught my hearing

I heard a sweet murmur of a lullaby song

When I had found the source it didn’t take long

There by a fallen tree was an elf, singing a song but not to himself

There was a beautiful beast laying right by his side

Of golden mane and white hair and hide

It was a unicorn with its horn like pearls

Lying beside the elf, its mane in curls

It drifted slowly and gently asleep

This image made my heart skip a beat

I can’t express this image to you

You have to see it yourself, you really do

But I will always remember that day so well

The image of a sleeping unicorn is a wonder to tell.

   

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Just not today

Let the tears come

Let the suffering come

Separation is here

So shed those tears

Love is gone

May the night sometime become day

So maybe I can feel like I want to play

But not today, life has gone sour

Right now is not the right hour

I do want to play

But not today

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Witches don’t like bitches

Trials and tribulations
I have this stipulation
If you don’t trust someone then you never will
I have this situation and an indication
That you will do me ill
So why should I stick around?
You’re trying to fool me, like some stupid clown
It’s not going to work
Go away you jerk!
Why do you always lurk?
You’re a stalker, that’s why I smirk
I can’t be with you
Go away
Did you hear me?
Go away – find someone else who’ll play
Why don’t you just fade away into an early grave?
Don’t misbehave!
Witches don’t like so called tough bitches that can’t walk the walk
Bitches that won’t stop the talk
Why don’t you stop your squawk?
Yes I’m talking to you bitch!

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Crystallaphones and plans

My plans for after Christmas are to find distance or online courses to learn how to read music and actually start becoming proficient in a musical instrument that’s not piano/keyboard based; this is because my interest in song writing and composing is becoming almost unbearable to ignore, particularly as I don’t have anyone in my life who’ll cause me stress anymore (other than a 3yr old son, but he’s sweet and easily worked around). 

I have found a new instrument that takes my interest and I hope I am lucky enough to do a part exchange with my electric guitar to get one, but I’ve heard to find one even in a music shop is rare, the instrument is… a crystallaphone, or as some people will know it as a glass xylophone; however it’s very likely that I’ll end up with a left handed electric guitar as a replacement (as I didn’t take my disability into consideration – my left hand has short tendons).

I am still heavily interested in watercolor painting and sketching, but I have put that on a back burner since I’ve been ill for the last three weeks, also the house needs organizing as I need to prepare a workspace for the art and the music I would like to take up.  I am slowly introducing myself to small chunks of work a week, roughly two hours a time, three days a week to settle into it because I am regularly ill, hence the unemployment I am in, I can’t hold a job down, not even a voluntary placement these days.  The mind and heart is willing but the body will not comply.

I need to find something that I can do from home but does not require me to use the telephone (not because I am unsocial, but because I have fluctuate hearing and regular ear infections that even an amplified phone is useless with) and despite this being the age of texting, not a lot of professionals or customers like communicating with staff via text only and most forget your hearing problems because when they talk to you face to face and you respond (because you’re an excellent lip reader) they think oh it’s not so bad.

Yes I know it’s strange that a person who has regular hearing problems wants to compose music, but there’s been others out there who have done it proficiently, so why can’t I?  I believe I am right in stating that Beethoven was stone deaf wasn’t he?  And one of the bee gees, he was like me, partially hearing, wasn’t he? And their music is great, isn’t it?

I don’t want to be a singer, I couldn’t take the commitment there because I never know when I am going to be sick and most of my sickness is based around practically all the aspects of the ear nose and throat, which doesn’t help for a singing life.  When I was younger I trained in opera but after the age of 12 I couldn’t sing it regularly enough to be considered talented in it, because I developed regular mastoid infections which needed regular operations etc. and singing became quite painful for me literally.

So with that said, I am trying my best to make myself a creative life and I hope that when things take off I find people who are sympathetic to those who have health problems and will help me work around them in a non-stressful manner.

 

 

 

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to part you recommended

The below text is a song I wrote, but I haven’t written the music yet; it’s jazz, I really like how it sounds in my head, to me the words make sense by the way it should be sung, but unfortunately I can’t sing the lyrics on a mic to post it so you get a fair idea because I’ve had a throat virus since February and it’s damaged my voice a little, but hopefully soon I can get composing the music (if I remember it) and it hopefully the words get sung properly by me so it’s good enough to sell.

I love you and you love me

How did I know this would end in tragedy?

So, there we was walking hand in hand

You’re the best boy I ever knew in this whole and massive land

So happy I am to be with you

I didn’t know it would end, I had no clue

You lead me astray and then it ended

When looking at the ocean

To part you recommended

That we’d part our ways and looking on at waves

I thought it couldn’t be true, but it was, our love is through woo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

Babe, our love has ended

Now what am I to do?

Woo hoo hoo hoo hoo

As I saw you leaving my heart it started grieving, wo hoo hoo hey

I couldn’t believe that it could end in such a way

The sun was setting over the horizon

I was lonely and my face was dampened with tears and the memories of the years we had together

WOO HOO HOO HOO HOO YEAH YEAH

I was looking back at your footsteps in the golden sand

A voice in the back of my head said he is not a man

Wo ho ho hey

Find yourself someone new, that’s what you have to do

Yeah yeah yeah

He left but I’m fine, so fine ha ha hine

I will find someone kind hey hey hey

I am stronger than that oh yea

I won’t cry anymore tears I swear

I let those memories hold me strong

So to you I don’t belong, but that’s OK

You’re not perfect anyway

So wrapped myself around my shawl

Heading home before the nightfall

Oh yeah heh heh yeah

I didn’t know it would end, I had no clue

You lead me astray and then it ended

When looking at the ocean

To part you recommended

That we’d part our ways and looking on at waves

I thought it couldn’t be true, but it was, our love is through

And I don’t care

No I don’t care

Not at all h-all

I’ll keep strong h-h-h-ong, yeah

 

 

 

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sailing into the moonbeams

moonbeams 1This is a song I wrote this morning, again I can hear the music and I know how it should be sung, but when reading it on paper it doesn’t seem like it makes much sense, but as a song in my head it’s beautiful and I wish I could write music so I could have done the music to go with it and sing it – it has a very Kate Bush mixed Sarah Brightman sound to the vocals.  I can sing, when my throat isn’t suffering it’s regular viruses, hence why I don’t aspire to be a singer/songwriter, just a songwriter/composer.  Hope you enjoy it?

Look at me

I am sailing into the moonbeams ahead of a dream

I am happy, with silver showers

Guiding me to be free

The night is a friend

I know her well

She is there for me always and is true to me

I trust her

She means the world to me

She helps me set my heart released

From, from the memory of you

I wrap myself up in a milky way – blanket made of silk

I feel the coolness of the air tonight

She has given me the sight – to know

That your weren’t the one for me

So now, I live my life free

Oh woe is not in my heart anymore

I am free now

I can live happily on in my dreams

Ahh, I can see that the night is an angel

She washes me as I sleep

Taking the badness of my day away

In my bed making me sail away

Into the moonshine, into the glaze of the universes wonderful maze

Oh it is true

Look at me

I am sailing into the moonbeams ahead of a dream

I am happy, with silver showers

Guiding me to be free

The night is a friend

I know her well

She is there for me always and is true to me

I trust her

She means the world to me

She helps me set my heart released

From, from the memory of you

 

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I wish my blanket could talk

I wish a blanket would wrap itself around me and talk

It would say, I’m sorry for your pains, everything will be OK

Just cuddle with me a little while, your heart has traveled many miles to pain, where it always rains

And I know you missed the train home, you’ve not option but to roam this land

The land of no hope, the land of black sands and I’m here for you

Yes you, you’re my wonder you’re my girl

You mean a lot to me, my world

And I’ll lay there, listening to these kind words

And I’ll dream of sunshine and I’ll run into the rainbow shouting, I am now free

Of you

That’s exactly what I’ll do

I am home now I will say, and I’ll stay here until the day I find love, true love

And my heart full of peace and little white doves will say

There won’t another, no way

This day, was always meant to be

This love has set me free

I am happy

But for now

I wish a blanket would wrap itself around me and talk

It would say, I’m sorry for your pains, everything will be OK

This is a song I wrote, if I had still of had cu-base connected to my computer and had a computer that could take it, I would have written some music with this, but I can’t read or write music without educative software, which is a shame really because the tune has really stuck in my head, it should be sung in a very catatonia or garbage kind of style/way.

 

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