I miss composing music, but there is no space to set up my equipment amongst other things – I lost Cubase around ten years ago and I can’t afford to replace it. I have learned in the past two years how to read music, but I am still not au fait with it to the point of any real confidence.
In the past few weeks I have wanted to compose music more than anything because my mind is literally torturing me with tunes and songs that need to be made – particularly instrumental music.
It’s getting very loud in my mind and there is nothing I can do about it right now.
I love instrumentals and the kind of music that is in my head is tango music, circus waltzes and similar sounds to my biggest musical inspirations Nox Arcana and B&B Project!
I did do composition for rock music and alternative too, but it is mostly classical or instrumental for me really.
I have four tunes that keep repeating themselves in my head and they do so at length and they get excessively loud at times and give me really bad headaches because I am ignoring them. It is exhausting to hear it, it tires me out and it comes to me mostly when I am in bed trying to get to sleep – that’s when it is their loudest!
What is even more annoying is the visuals I get when this happens – I don’t mean real visuals, nothing like hallucinations or anything like that, no – what I mean is, the scenery in which the music wants to be played. The music seems to demand being played in my stories, as parts of movies or something, it shows me what must happen for the perfect habitat for my music to reside.
I sometimes wonder if I am crazy…
“A perfect habitat for my music to reside”, that’s crazy talk right?
My compositions are like living breathing demons, well, if you heard the music and saw the imagery, you’d wonder if they were demons too…
The music that wants to be born in recent weeks sound like Halloween background music for Halloween waltzes or tangoes… it’s not something you’d usually hear at say The BBC Proms. Instruments such as the accordion, bandura and violin lead the music here.
Some of the music sound like a demonic nursery lullabies or music boxes, instruments such as glockenspiels, glass harps and glass bells lead the orchestra. This tune in particular has decided to set its scene in my horror story which you’ll know as boat 1, this story is about ghost children.
I need to compose again, I need these tunes to be heard, but it’s difficult right now. So I guess, I will let the demonic orchestra from Hell send me mad then?
It perhaps would be fun to do collaboration with other horror writers about a musician being sent mad by demonic music that he must compose; a sort of musical Arabian nights meets the devil!
Stop, no more ideas brain, please, I am drowning in ideas!
Maybe this is the devil’s idea for a certain writer?