I tried

My soul is dead

It’s gone and buried

It died slowly these past nine years

It was awful

Painful and harried

I tried to save myself

So much, alone

But there is only so much you can do

When the birds eat the seeds you’ve sown

You try to pick yourself up

Brush yourself down

But then you look around you

All you see are frowns

No one is happy here in this place

The house is a mess, no it’s a disgrace

You try to smile and spur them on

To pick themselves up and sing a happy song

But they frown harder still and scream for silence

It’s funny to think I chose this over violence

It’s a funny old world

But I do not laugh

I’ve not had a life, not even half

I’ve tried to pull through all the shit and decay

I’ve done it alone but I’m covered in heavy clay

Of the burdens of my choices

The ones I thought best

But instead the path I fell to

Was an utter mess

It’s weighing me down

All this clay

I am growing tired to fight or play

I just can’t cope anymore alone

I’m just not happy in my own home

I need to try harder I guess

But I feel weak, drowned in mess

I don’t have the spark anymore to try

I only wish that I could die

I need to start again

In another life

I can’t go on

But at least I tried

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Filed under About Me, poetry

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