I am conflicted with my main project AD (anthropomorphic dystopian idea); I had wanted this to be the one that goes out to agents in October and that might still happen, but I feel I am not ready for that on a personal level. What I do feel ready to release in October potentially could be another project I am halfway through, which is my Christmas story.
Why am I so conflicted?
Because I want my AD project to be a graphic novel and I also want to do the art for it too, but my art is not good enough for what I want it to be yet. So, I am making it something I don’t want it to be – a series of novellas.
I want to stay true to my heart, but some friends who have had big hints about the work want this project out there now! I feel I owe it to them; so many people are excited for this project.
But do I want to renege on my plans for it to be a graphic novel and make a series of novellas out them at the risk that someday I might re-write it in graphic novel form and get it published again in that format, or should I wait?
My heart tells me two things – hurry up and practise your art work and how to write graphic novels professionally and get the work out there ASAP, but it also says, it’s not realistic just yet, give yourself another year, you can always send out your other works which don’t need so much from you!
The problem comes with the fact that one of my friends is so excited about the idea, that it has stirred a desire in them to make something similar, based on hints I’ve given them about the plot. They can’t plagiarise it, as it is very vague, but the vague outline I have given is enough that it could be a direct competition. They have promised not to create their urges just yet, but they have said to me that they may not hold back after spring 2023 if I haven’t sent it anywhere – because they have to presume that I am not really interested in a career by then, if I hold back for a few more months… yet again.
I am serious about starting a writing career at the end of this year. In October I am going to turn forty and I am determined to get something out there at least.
If an agent doesn’t want to represent whatever work I put out by January 1st, then I will personally publish an anthology of my poems through Amazon and start looking towards writing magazine articles and short stories whilst still on the lookout.
I am very interested in approaching a British gardening magazines because of my in depth knowledge about gardening organically and so on; this is something I have wanted to do for a few years now.
Paul wants to collaborate with me as well for wildlife photography magazines etc.
So all of this starts by the end of this year, I wasn’t ready for it before now, but now I am – particularly as my health is stabilising and I am getting more good days.
Another friend knows my dream is mostly to write for movies, that although I love books and being creative, my dream is for my ideas to be televised in some way. They’ve put me into contact with someone who has put me on a free screenwriting course and so that’s on the go as well at the moment! Henry is honing his skills with the computer to create special effects etc., so we can make snazzy YouTube art movies together, based on my ideas and a friend has suggested I start attending short film festivals.
All of the above will be documented here in this blog as it happens, so expect better content in a few months’ time!
So for now, project AD is still being written, but it is in a state of limbo – should I or shan’t I send it to an agent in October?
Who knows what I will do!